Men's Mental Health Month: Breaking the Silence
- Indumathi B
- 3 days ago
- 14 min read
Men's mental health has remained a crisis that has been silent and under-discussed. It's more than just a personal struggle as globally men suffer more than what we realize. And the patriarchy that's built for men is the major thing that brings them down by not letting them be human. And many of us don't even realize how badly it's costing men's mental health.
Men are asked to fight the battles out in the world that they neglect their inner struggles. This emotional suppression has led to depression, anxiety, loneliness, addictions, and many mental health issues that quietly build up over time. Studies show that men die by suicide nearly four times more often than women yet less than half seek treatment. The conversations around men’s emotional well-being often stay buried under stigma, societal expectations, and outdated ideas of masculinity.
This men's mental health awareness month, let us spread more attention on men and collectively try to break the stigma, notice the hidden signs of mental pain that men go through. By this, we can move forward in empowering men to reclaim their well being through support and self care. This blog gives you clear insights and strategies that might actually bring in hope and change the dynamics of men's mental health.
When is Men's Mental Health Month?
The answer might vary depending on where you are in the world.
In the US, Mental Health America (MHA) officially recognizes June as Men's Mental Health Awareness Month. So, this has initiated many programs and campaigns about broader men's mental health issues around June.
However, in the UK and many other countries, November is recognized as men's mental health month. This aligns with the movement called “Movember” where men grow moustaches to raise awareness about prostate cancer, testicular cancer, and men's mental health in general. November also features International Men's Day on November 19, which focuses on celebrating positive male role models, improving gender relations, and highlighting men's mental health awareness.
So, is June/November men's mental health month? Both serve as powerful awareness periods. What matters is not when, but how focused we are on men's mental health throughout the year.
Significance of Men's Mental Health Awareness
The numbers tell a heart wrenching story of men and mental health:
Despite being the 50% of the population, men account for nearly 80% of all suicides.
Only 40% of men with reported mental illness receive treatment while its 52% for women
49% of men feel more depressed than they openly admit to others
Men are three times more likely to develop alcohol dependence than women
Globally, a man dies by suicide every minute.
Men are 3 to 4 times more likely to die by suicide but less likely to be diagnosed with depression.
These statistics don't mean that men are suffering more mentally than women, it says that men are going through stuff quietly and dealing alone. This delays seeking help until they are mentally extremely unmanageable, costing their lives.
The crisis is not only about mental health disorders. It’s also about:
emotional isolation
lack of safe spaces to be vulnerable
pressure to “be strong” (like the “be a man” phrases)
fear of appearing weak (as the conditioning goes like weak=feminine)
cultural conditioning that discourages vulnerability
When all of these combine, they become vulnerable to mental disorders or create a storm that they struggle to navigate alone.
The Silent Struggle: Why Men Don’t Seek Help
Here's where patriarchy comes into picture. It conditioned society into a false ideology of how a man should be for decades. Rooting toxic masculinity in men, injecting them to always be strong, stoic, unemotional, tough, self sufficient, emotionally independent and uninclined. And it has blinded men to the harm it is causing them internally as they don't even acknowledge that many times.
a. The Conditioning Starts Young
Boys grow up hearing:
“Don’t cry.”
“Man up.”
“Handle it yourself.”
“Stop acting weak.”
These phrases preach a wrong notion that “weak is for the women”. What's wrong in being weak and vulnerable? It is what makes us human. And society is asking men to not be human!? It's teaching boys to suppress emotions instead of expressing them. By adulthood, many men get fully conditioned to this and grow up with the lack of emotional vocabulary. And obviously, they can't do what they don't know and didn't do throughout their lives, i.e., emotional expression.
b. Men Fear Judgment
Studies show that 40% of men say they feel shame when they think about seeking therapy or being vulnerable. Many fear being labeled as
unstable
weak
dramatic
incapable
soft/ vulnerable
This fear is particularly strong in societies where men are expected to be the backbone of the family. Or in the families where patriarchy is deeply rooted, not allowing men to be softened down a little.
c. The Performance of Strength
Men are expected to:
provide financially
stay emotionally steady
take responsibility for everyone else
solve problems independently
This expectation pushes men into a room where vulnerability is absent. Even when men feel overwhelmed, they often hide their emotions to protect their image, relationships, or social status.
The Hidden Signs: How Mental Health Issues Present Differently in Men
One of the reasons why men's mental health is often unnoticed or unacknowledged is because of the symptoms. The symptoms men show are different to what women show or like what is traditionally or generally presented. For example, while major depression symptoms are seen as sadness or hopelessness, men may present it differently than the most highly acknowledged ones. Men's mental health struggles often appear as:
Anger, irritability, and aggression instead of visible sadness
Risk-taking behaviors like reckless driving, gambling, or unsafe activities
Substance abuse like alcohol or drugs to avoid feeling emotional pain
Escapist behaviors like excessive working, gaming, or isolating at the gym
Physical symptoms like headaches, digestive problems, and chronic fatigue
Withdrawal from relationships and activities previously enjoyed
Sleep disturbances, either insomnia or sleeping excessively
A landmark study found that when alternative male-type symptoms were included in depression assessments, more men met criteria for depression than women (26.3% vs. 21.9%). Traditional diagnostic tools, developed primarily based on how women experience depression, often miss these presentations, leaving countless men undiagnosed.
And why is it primarily based on women's experiences?
Because obviously the tools, assessments, will be developed around the more visible or frequent help seeking patterns which are typically seen in women. As men don't often seek help, their symptom presentations got overlooked.
Unique Challenges Men Face Across Life Stages
Childhood: Learning to Shut Down
From a very young age of 5, boys are taught that emotions are “feminine” or “weak.” The phrases like “Don’t cry,” “Man up,” “Stop being a baby” are constantly used, teaching them that pain, either physical or emotional, must be hidden, not held.
In school years (9–12), boys usually show more conduct issues and hyperactivity, but these behaviors get punished. They are most likely not understood as distress. Vulnerability becomes socially dangerous. Many boys cope by suppressing problems, which becomes their default emotional strategy for life.
Adolescence (13–19): Pressure Without Language
Adolescence is when boys’ mental health sharply diverges from girls’. Hormones spike, and social rules around masculinity grow stricter. Peer groups openly police vulnerability with “no homo,” “don’t be soft,” “stop acting like a girl.” Emotional honesty becomes risky.
Boys dealing with identity confusion, sexuality, academic pressure, or family stress rarely speak up. Instead, their struggles show up as irritability, aggression, risk-taking, escapism, or substance use. These are classic male externalizing symptoms, but parents and teachers often see a “moody teenager” instead of a boy in emotional pain.
Because their distress looks like “attitude,” boys get discipline instead of support. And the silence deepens.
Early Adulthood (20–35): Provider Pressure and Silent Panic
Career Pressure
This is the stage where the provider identity really solidifies. Men are more likely to work full-time and quietly tie their self-worth to job performance, so when they fail or stagnate, it doesn’t feel like a professional setback, but a personal failure. High-pressure fields like finance, tech, sales, corporate law, and construction create chronic stress, yet many men believe showing weakness will cost them respect or opportunity. They push through burnout quietly, normalising emotional exhaustion instead of naming it as distress.
Even so‑called “safe” desk jobs take a silent toll. Constant emails, targets, and screen time keep men’s nervous systems on high alert, while long sitting hours and digital overload drain sleep, mood, and energy. Because worth is often measured in productivity, promotions, and pay, many men feel they cannot say “I’m burnt out” without risking status, so they hide behind jokes about “corporate slavery” instead of admitting genuine distress. These patterns show how deeply workplace environments shape men’s mental health.
High‑Risk Work:
Across India, men overwhelmingly occupy the country’s most hazardous and physically demanding jobs, an imbalance that mirrors global patterns but is even more stark in the Indian context. According to the Labour Bureau’s 2020 Statistics of Factories report, 95.9% of all reported industrial injuries and fatalities involved men, with only 4.1% involving women. This extreme disparity reflects not only gendered labour patterns but also the concentration of men in high‑risk sectors such as construction, mining, manufacturing, transport, and heavy industry.
India‑specific studies echo this. In Dadra and Nagar Haveli’s industrial sector, women made up around 20% of the workforce but only 3.33% of fatalities, showing that the deadliest tasks like machine handling, electrical work, and hazardous materials are predominantly assigned to men. A Delhi construction‑site study found over 96% of injuries occurred in men, and a 2024 assessment reported a 34.6% pooled prevalence of non‑fatal injuries among male workers, highlighting the everyday toll of hazardous labour.
This Indian picture aligns with global data. ILO analysis across 121 countries shows that
97% of building and related trades workers,
97% of drivers and mobile‑plant operators,
83% of labourers in mining, construction, manufacturing and transport, and
over 90% of armed‑forces occupations are male.
These sectors like construction, mining, heavy transport, industrial labour, and military roles are exactly those associated with the highest fatality and injury rates worldwide.
In the US, 90–93% of all occupational deaths involve men;
In the UK, recent HSE data show about 95% of workplace fatalities are male;
In Australia, 96% of work‑related deaths in 2024 occurred among men.
Veterans and active‑duty personnel sit inside this same high‑risk group. They face not only physical danger but also higher rates of PTSD, depression, and suicide, shaped by combat trauma, constant exposure to threat, and the difficult transition back to civilian life. Similarly, in agriculture, especially in India, men usually hold land titles and loans; when crops fail or debt piles up, it is mostly men who are blamed or who blame themselves, which helps explain why farmer suicides are overwhelmingly male.
While physical injuries and fatalities are visible, the mental‑health impact on men in these hazardous roles is often invisible and unaddressed. Long hours, unsafe conditions, economic pressure to provide, job insecurity, and witnessing accidents or deaths contribute to chronic stress, anxiety, depression, trauma, and burnout. Studies of high‑risk workers like factory workers, construction labourers, drivers, farmers, armed‑forces personnel show elevated psychological distress and reduced well‑being, especially in settings where safety systems are weak and seeking psychological support is seen as “unmanly.”
Relationships
Romantic relationships demand emotional presence, but many men weren’t taught how to name or express emotions. Partners ask for vulnerability, but men often don’t have the vocabulary or practice to open up. They become quiet, defensive, or distant, not out of lack of care, but lack of emotional tools.
Fatherhood
Up to 10% of new fathers experience postpartum depression, yet hardly anyone talks about “dad depression.” Men feel pressure to be protector, provider, and present parent all at once. When overwhelmed, they often escape into work, screens, or substances because saying “I’m struggling” feels unsafe.
Mid-Adulthood (36–50): “Have It All Together” on the Outside
By this stage, men already have the responsibilities of family, career, and a reputation in the society that makes it even more difficult for them to slow down or feel vulnerable. This is the peak stage where they have loans to pay, children's education, aging parents, intense competition at work. All these collide stressing them more, and men fear that they might lose relevance, money, respect if they don't keep up with everything.
At home, emotional distance becomes common. Men with no emotional skills can't connect with teenage children or emotionally drained partners. And marriage can start to incline more towards chores, work, responsibilities rather than love connection. This leaves resentment and loneliness in each other.
Later Adulthood (50+): Invisibility and Accumulated Silence
As men age, invisibility becomes a mental health challenge. Retirement or job loss removes the structure and identity they built life around. Physical changes like illness, fatigue, sexual dysfunction challenge their sense of masculinity.
Long-term relationships may feel mechanical. As men usually bond over shared activities like sports, etc., friendships may fade as common activities end due to aging. That's the reason why older men often have smaller social networks compared to older women who bond over expressing feelings and life events more.
Decades of pressure, grief, unexpressed feelings, health worries, and identity loss converge, often with no emotional outlet. This can slowly drain hope and motivation, leaving many older men feeling like there is “nothing left to look forward to,” even if they never say this out loud.
Some other men specific things costing men’s mental health
Divorce Culture and Alimony
Divorce today is more common, but men often pay a heavy, quiet mental price. After separation, men are more likely to:
lose daily contact with children
lose their primary emotional support (their partner)
lose their home, routines, and identity as husband/father/provider
For many men, divorce feels like an identity collapse. When the family system they anchored themselves to breaks apart, they often have no emotional backup system. Friends say, “You’ll bounce back,” but rarely know how to sit with male grief. Many men retreat into work, alcohol, or screens instead.
Separated men globally have significantly higher suicide risk, especially in midlife.
In India, divorce brings another layer of pressure:
About 42% of divorced men report taking loans just to pay alimony or legal fees.
Many feel unfairly burdened or harassed during contentious cases.
Some experience hopelessness or suicidal thoughts due to financial strain and social stigma.
For Indian men, alimony isn’t just financial, it hits identity, dignity, and self-worth. Losing daily access to children, facing societal judgment, and navigating long legal battles create intense emotional load. Court proceedings that stretch for years leave many men describing this phase as “the lowest point of life.”
In a culture that expects men to be strong and self-sacrificing, admitting that legal stress or loss is breaking them feels unsafe. So most suffer silently.
Why Men Turn to Substance Abuse More Than Women
Men are statistically far more likely to develop substance use disorders. The driver isn't just biology, it’s emotional conditioning too.
As men are taught: don’t cry, be strong, handle it alone. By adulthood, alcohol or drugs become the “acceptable” way to cope. Male peer groups often normalize heavy drinking, mocking therapy but respecting “I got drunk last night.” This creates a pipeline:
emotional suppression → stress → substance use → addiction
Over time as addiction develops, men drink or use substances just to feel normal. This in turn will strain relationships, drop performance, and worsens mental health, forcing them to drink more again. It becomes a never ending cycle.
Women also use substances but they often do it to cope with emotional pain. But men tend to do it to avoid vulnerability. Both suffer, but men’s struggles often explode publicly (anger, reckless behavior, visible crises) rather than internally (health breakdown, quiet distress) like for many women.
Also, in many cultures, men are casually allowed to drink or smoke socially, while women are judged or restricted. So men’s use is both more exposed and more normalized, which can quietly push it towards dependence without people around them recognizing it as a problem until very late.
Screen Time and Men’s Mental Health
If we look in a broader perspective including rural areas, men often have more access to screens and heavier digital use like gaming, scrolling, trading, porn, or work emails. Screens become a silent escape that slowly reshapes emotional life, especially by disrupting healthy sleep patterns. Screen time also leads
reduced physical movement
weakened relationships
dopamine dependence
In many households, especially in rural or traditional settings, the primary or best smartphone often belongs to the man, because he is seen as the earner, decision-maker, or the one who “needs” the device for work, banking, travel, or social status. But women and children share or use lower-end devices with more restrictions. Globally, men also spend more time online than women and are more represented among heavy users of gaming, crypto/trading apps, and certain social platforms, which increases both the quantity and intensity of their screen exposure.
This greater, less-supervised access makes it easier for screen use to become a default coping mechanism for stress whether through endless scrolling, gaming, porn, or late-night work emails. For men who already struggle to talk about emotions, screens offer a silent escape that feels safe in the moment but gradually amplifies isolation, burnout, anxiety, and low mood, making it harder to notice problems early or reach out for help.
Porn Use and Men’s Mental Health
Problematic porn use is far more common in men. What starts as “stress relief” can become compulsive, altering the brain’s reward system. Over time, men may need more extreme content, feel shame afterward, and struggle with real-life intimacy.
Porn overuse is linked to:
anxiety
depression
low self-worth
relationship conflict
performance anxiety
Especially when used to escape emotional pain rather than address it, porn can deepen loneliness and disconnect men further from real human connection and their own bodies.
Heat, Climate Stress & Men’s Mental Health
Rising heat and climate-related stress don’t just harm the body. They directly affect mood, irritability, sleep, and overall mental health. Higher temperatures are linked with more aggression, restlessness, anxiety, and even increased suicide rates. And in countries like India, men face this impact more intensely because they are the ones expected to be outside.
Many men work outdoors in construction, agriculture, delivery, transport, or factory jobs, spending long hours under extreme heat. Physical exhaustion + economic pressure becomes a silent mental load. But even outside of formal jobs, men are socially assigned to outdoor responsibilities like getting groceries, running errands, handling repairs, managing travel, and “stepping out” whenever needed. Knowing how to drive becomes another expectation, so men end up driving long distances, navigating heavy traffic, dealing with pollution, noise, heat, and constant sensory overload.
All of this creates a quiet form of climate anxiety: the chronic stress of functioning in unsafe temperatures, unpredictable weather, pollution, and environmental uncertainty, while still needing to “show up” and provide. Men push through dangerous conditions because society frames endurance as responsibility. But this comes at a cost:
Irritability and frustration from heat + traffic
Burnout from long hours outdoors
Sleep disturbances due to heat stress
Increased substance use to decompress
Buildup of suppressed emotions because they cannot complain
Men are taught to push through discomfort, not talk about it. So heat, pollution, long drives, and outdoor pressure quietly chip away at both physical and mental health and yet most men don’t even name it as stress.
Practical Self-Care Strategies for Men Mental Health
The first step doesn't have to be big. It can be as small as noticing your emotions while taking a pause. Such small, consistent actions create a meaningful impact. As men already struggle to seek help, the best way to keep their mental health in check is to start by doing these small actions-
Physical Activity: As movement reduces stress, try to go for a walk at least.
Journaling: Write your thoughts, emotions without having to feel shame or judgement.
Build Your Support Network: Maintain at least 1-2 people with whom you can be yourself.
Prioritize Sleep: regulate your sleep patterns with consistent bedtime routines and limiting screen time before bed as it affects sleep and mental health.
Mindfulness and Breathing: Even five minutes of daily deep breathing or meditation can reduce stress.
Pursue Hobbies: Engage yourself in creative activities like music, cooking, fishing or anything that provides a mental break from your daily life stressors.
Limit Alcohol: It may soothe you temporarily. But in the long run, it’s pushing you more into the black hole of anxiety and depression.
How to Support Men and Mental Health in Your Life
It is highly important for all of us to give attention to men's mental well being. Supporting them in ways we can could save men from drowning alone.
Create Safe Spaces: Let them know they can talk without fear of judgment or shame.
Validate Emotions: Acknowledge what they feel instead of minimizing it. Sometimes “I understand why this feels heavy” is enough.
Listen Actively: Listen more than you speak. Give them space to express themselves fully.
Avoid Toxic Positivity: Don’t force them to “stay positive.” Let them feel their emotions without pressure to be okay.
Encourage Professional Help: Gently guide them toward therapy or counseling when needed.
If you want to hear this from a man who has lived it, this TEDx talk by Henry Nelson is a powerful watch. He shares how toxic workplace culture, “man up” expectations, and silence around men’s emotions pushed him to the edge, and how one friend reaching out started to change everything.
Conclusion:
Men’s mental health isn’t just a “men’s issue.” It affects partners, children, families, workplaces, and entire communities. When men are allowed to be human, not just providers, protectors, and problem-solvers, everyone around them lives in a safer, softer world.
If you’re a man reading this, take one small step today: message someone you trust, book that therapy consultation, go for that walk, or simply admit to yourself, “I’m not okay, and I deserve support.” If you love a man, don’t wait for him to break. Ask, listen, stay. Share this, start uncomfortable conversations, and be the person who makes it safer for men to feel.
Men’s mental health matters. And what you choose to do after reading this matters too.